Somehow another day can be different- and luckily today feels better. Having routines return, a little privacy goes a long way. When the kids are home on break, all the hanging out dissipates me. I can't quite focus on anything too involved- my functioning level is best left at cooking, laundry and trying to move the day along. When they leave for school, my vista broadens and I can let my imagination roam free. Somewhere, the current of creativity is coursing through me but slowing down enough, the internal quiet I need to tap in to it completely evades me. In my earlier, single life making art was my hobby, pastime and obsession.
Now, I try to shoehorn artistic endeavors around the swirl of chaos created by 3 children, husband, chores, pets, dramas and problems. Not very inspired. I miss the closeness I felt to some other part of myself when I was involved in creating. Let's see if I can tap into it again.