Suppose this

At times, I really don't know how to be. (Except I do.) I'm not supposed to ask for anything. I am supposed to give as much as I can. I am supposed to give whatever is asked of me. I am supposed to accept whatever I am given. I am supposed to not have any opinions that aren't nice. (I think I am allowed to have them. I am not supposed to express them.) I am supposed to like being a mother. I am supposed to like being a mother even when my family isn't supportive of me. I am supposed to take everyone's nuttiness. I am supposed to act like I care about others at all times. I am supposed to jump when someone needs something. I am supposed to not notice when people don't jump when I need something. I am supposed to be okay with however everything works out. I am supposed to do all the boring unpaid stuff because it needs to be done. I am supposed to feel okay when no one notices or appreciates the effort I make on their behalf. I am supposed to feel okay being invisible. I am supposed to feel okay surrendering my needs for someone else. I am supposed to feel that this is love when it doesn't feel like love at all. I am supposed to be okay with whatever hurts come my way because after all, that's the way I am supposed to feel.