Unseasonably Warm for February

The end of the month approaches and the early bulbs are bursting out of the ground. There are signs of life everywhere. The hellebore's blooms should unfurl within the week. The political events that frame the every day are a constant source of concern, anxiety and bewilderment. The personal plane recedes.

Yet the entity that stalks me on this blog whenever I go public bothers me more than I care to admit.
So, if you are reading this, and would like to subscribe to Curb Appeal in Sleepy Hollow please send an email to dorothyhandelman@gmail.com as I intend to make it private once and for all soon.

Otherwise- have a good one and as my kid likes to remind me when I remark on the nicer weather..."Thank you global warming!!"

And so it goes

I am particularly sad lately. Empty nest for the most part and spouse relocated to his solo abode- I am sprung in to a new sphere.  My children have minimal requirements of me- I am free to steer my boat wherever I need or wish to- all my decisions are about me, for me and include mostly only me. I have to admit, it's a little heart breaking after all the years contentedly embroiled in family life. I have arrived in a country I didn't necessarily want to visit- but really felt I had no choice. I was not of the happily married persuasion and life was stretching out too far in front to suffer indefinitely what had become our distant, sad marital discourse.

I can say I saw it coming. Have anticipated all the events that have transpired up to now. The tangible reality of what is my here and now is overwhelming and requires my best effort yet. Wish me luck that a new normal  of connection and caring awaits me in the future.

Trying to Feel It

Mid divorce and the stresses I avoided as my marriage unravelled are surfacing. It's easy to succumb to traumas small and large. I'm a goner. Staring at the ceiling, trying to figure out why so much has gone off the rails. An unscheduled day is a golden opportunity for my loss and frustration to overwhelm me- digesting the minutiae of the death of my imperfect union. Now, recently positioned as single and not reversing the course, I am with ample opportunity to dissect the past, re-examine my distant but economically stable father, and the myriad of men (starting with 4 older brothers) who have populated the skies of my firmament if not held me firmly in their arms on a romantic basis (relatives excluded)

So, it's with a jaded eye that I anticipate the arrival of Valentines Day. Truthfully, my heart thuds more than pitter pats and I wish I was busy with some clever missive about love and it many wonders.

I'm working on it.

Working my Attitude

There's a lot to feel affection for, especially one federal apppeals court judge in Washington State who issued an opinion that blocked the enforcement of a misguided Executive Order issued by our new President.

My heart is full of warm feelings for those who seek to do good and who get up every day with a desire to make the world a better place. Now that's love!

Thinking Valentines

Feburary 1st means only one thing- that there is a scant two weeks to create a Valentine (or not) if I so choose. I'm not exactly overflowing with romantic feelings... but I have lots of appreciation for the good that exists.

Hoping some inspiration finds me soon. There isn't much that's nicer than expressions of love.